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Know Your Nose

Kurt Vonnegut’s portrait signature is forever something to be remembered by. Simplistic in it’s execution, it says a lot about the man; his wild hair depicting his no-boundary style of work, his forever-in-thought eyes, his signature in the middle of it all, representing the clutter in his mind that most writers and creative folk are merely impacted with.

kurt-vonneguts-signature

A friend and I were talking about this the other day.

Me: You know some hipster douche bag is going to try and recreate this with their name and their portrait then brand it as their own and call it a ‘coincidence’.

Friend: Of course… In fact, you should be the first douche bag to do it.

Me: I don’t think I have any features worth exaggerating. My facial profile isn’t very exciting…

Friend: I wouldn’t say that. Your nose is kind of adorable.

Me: What.

Friend: Your personality really stems from it, I’d say. It’s like one of those turned-up, pixie/button noses, but with a disruptive slope – You know, like one of those giant slides you see at fair grounds with the bump in the middle of them… Beauty meets not-so-beauty. Like Anne Baxter, but maybe after being punched in the face once or twice… Though, your septum doesn’t drag down like some people, but maybe the way your nostrils flare when you get really, really pissed off could- Yeah, like that! -And the crinkle in your brow when- Wait, why are you giving me that look?

Me: I’m thinking of twenty different ways to hurt you without killing you.

Friend: I’d be careful about that. Because clearly I know how to describe you to the police department’s sketch artist.

Me: No you don’t – You’d just send them on a hunt for a rabid McDonald’s playplace.

With that said, I did create a new signature last night. And you know what? May all of my signatures be forever as slopey as a run down carnival ride, as wavy as the rolling hills of the Seven Sisters, as regal as the back fat from a devoted Wal*Mart customer.

I hope you all have a fantastic day, and pat your schnoz on the bridge. It deserves it.

signed,

shnoz sig

Cabin Fever

I stayed at a cottage with a friend for a few days in New Hampshire. We shopped, we skulked, we hassled house spiders and I nervously watched as she got a dermal piercing done by a man with hands as shaky as a recovering junkie. It was good to get away for a few days and not care about anything, except for writing half-assed fan fiction until 6am and eating Pop Tarts for dinner. Now, I feel perfectly fueled to tackle a bunch of art projects that I have been neglecting, rejecting, or just plain and simply want to set on fire (but we’ll just label that one performance art).

Sketches I did while I was away:

sketch2

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SPEAKING OF ANCIENT PROJECTS THAT NEED TO GET THE FUCK FINISHED, here is an old WIP from 6 years ago that was inspired by Jose Packard from Twin Peaks:

wip

Oy. Slowly but surely… And last but not least, I bought a punching bag.

But that’s a whole ‘nother post.

x

Write like it’s worth it.

As I slowly crawl out of my shell, half awake and needy, I take a moment to clear my head – Think about not only the things that I have already done, but all there is that could be done. So in order to get myself back into full throttling, choke-holding gear, I have been making an effort to draw out every story wip, and bring them to life just a little bit more through previews of cover art.

 

TREATMENT promo cover

 

‘TREATMENT’ is a story that I have been slowly sculpting together since winter. Parading itself around in my OpenOffice as a half script, half novel – It’s about the unlikely friendships of a doctor, a copper, and London’s most expensive male prostitute, who all take a keen interest in eachother’s unique yet lonely lives.

It is a dark screwball comedy with (ideally) a shit ton of master shots, and a hint of surreal, sexually stimulated ambiance; like Jimmy Stewart trapped in a Jack Vettriano painting, the plan for it is to give you visual pleasure as much as it gives comedic relief.